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I would much rather explore and examine, from the perspective of being on the other side of the experience, not just what I want, but what I want, even though relationship experts generally encourage focus on the positive.

I am a believer, based on my own personal and professional perspective that I need to clear the detritus of previous encounters in order to build anew.

After all, the key to a good date is relaxed conversation, and the last thing you want is to recreate the beginning of this scene from But whether you're trying to fill an awkward silence or just trying to get to know your date better, we have you covered.The other person has “been there, done that, got the t-shirt” too. My current definition involves two people who have a common and merged vision, who communicate it openly and who take steps daily to strengthen and support that bond.As a minister who has married over 300 couples since 1999, I have witnessed this dynamic with many of them.Without necessarily disclosing the names of all previous lovers and interactions, it is important that a partner know if there are others still in your life. Of course, these are inquiries that take place over time and not all at once on a first date.The professional interviewer in me laughs at the Ally Mc Beal internal dialog absurdity of that scenario.

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